Friday, September 09, 2005

Berger's theft: We'll never know

The Sandy Berger scandal seems to have come to an end. The AP reports: "A judge on Thursday ordered Sandy Berger, President Clinton's national security adviser, to pay a $50,000 fine for illegally taking classified documents from the National Archives."

The article goes on to summarize the story: "The sentencing capped a bizarre sequence of events in which Berger admitted to sneaking classified documents out of the Archives in his suit, later destroying some of them in his office and then lying about it."

One naturally thinks that he was trying to destroy evidence of grave Clinton administration national security lapses (while simultaneously demonstrating the character of the Clinton White House).

ScrappleFace satire:
Berger to Pay Fine from Sales of New Book
by Scott Ott

(2005-09-09) -- After a judge ordered former Clinton administration national security adviser Samuel 'Sandy' Berger to pay a $50,000 fine for stealing documents from the National Archives and lying about the theft, Mr. Berger told the court he could pay the fine from the proceeds of a new book he's writing about the Federal Reserve.

"Your Honor, to complete my blockbuster book I need to do some academic research at the
Bureau of Engraving and Printing," Mr. Berger said. "If I could just have a few hours of unmonitored study there, where they print U.S. currency, I'd be in a better position to pay my debt to society."

Meanwhile, a spokesman for former President Bill Clinton praised the court's decision because "it closes the book on this case, finally and forever."

"No further information is needed about why Mr. Berger stole the memos, or who might benefit from the destruction of several copies of the documents," the unnamed Clinton spokesman said. "Show's over folks. Nothing to see here. Move along now."

Creative Commons License